RIP Grandma

Categories: BlogBy Published On: February 10, 202143.4 min read952 words12 Comments

My grandma has passed away.

I don’t have the adequate words for once in my life.

I just lost my last grandparent. I just lost one of the only people who stood up for me as a child. I just lost a person who I could confide in and she accepted and loved me. I went to her when I was 16 and told her about the severe abuse that I had experienced and she cried with me and just loved on me. She believed me. When my family moved back to WA– I was in the 8th grade and once I learned how to drive ect I spent a ton of time with my grandma.

In my early 20’s when I got divorced and was a single mom…my grandma was my best friend. We did so many things together. She helped me heal through that.

When I married Rob we stayed the night at her house the night before and she was the biggest supporter. She loved that I had all of these kids and she told me that one day I would miss all of the chaos. I was supposed to enjoy it. She was right. She would put on a show for my kids and make them laugh. If you bring up grandma to them now they will chuckle because she went out of her way to make them laugh.

She wasn’t a conventional grandmother. I accepted that, just as she had accepted me. She was more of a wild woman never following rules. I am a rule follower by nature. We balanced each other out a little. She was more of a fighter and wouldn’t take nonsense from anyone. She was a good person to have in your corner. LOL! She always told me “Only the good die young, I will live forever” ….I believed her. It’s still hard to absorb.

My grandma shared so much with me. There was never anything off limits. I could ask her anything and she would tell me her stories. I know the good bad and the ugly. She wanted me to learn from her. I loved that. When I took care of her after a heart attack and stroke a few years ago..I would stay by her bedside and when she would wake up, we would play a question game. We couldn’t do much because she was paralyzed and blind on one side. So talking and sharing was the best use of our time. She would ask me a question like “what is your favorite memory” and then we would both answer. Then I would ask her a question…mostly about her childhood, being a mom, something happy to make her think and recall something good to focus on. I feel like I have many stories to pass on.

I ended up flying her to Florida to live with my Aunt. I packed up her house and she started a new chapter in a new state. It was sad to do that. It was the house she built, raised her family and it was the one place that seemed to be “home” for everyone.

I have so many memories. Times shared. Words of wisdom ..even if it was her warning me not to be like her. There is no way to write it all in a blog post. There is no way I can express the loss that I feel.

Even as a a grown woman with children when I went to visit her she would serve me fruit juice in a glass with a straw. LOL! She would always make me a pan of my favorite layer dip and she would share her latest shopping deals. She loved shopping…especially if she could find a good deal. I am not so much a shopper anymore. I think after cleaning out a few houses of people who collect stuff….I have been cured. haha! Less is more. Less is more. I have so much stuff already. I keep trying to get rid of stuff.

I think about how she worked to get to America. It was an unconventional way. But she got here, legally. She was so proud to be here. She always missed home (Iceland)…but it was a badge of honor to her family that she made it to America. They thought her life was perfect– simply because she lived here. It wasn’t a bed of roses…but until the end my grandma was causing trouble at her assisted living facility because she was supposed to have FREEDOM in America. LOL! She didn’t like anyone telling her what to do. I chuckle at that because they were just doing their job….but she was fighting the good fight for all of us. Fighting for freedom.

She loved music. Elvis was her number one heartthrob and singer.  She said if she could have learned something in her life she would have learned to play the piano. She loved piano music. Liberache was her favorite. We had to listen to him every Christmas. One year she gave us all CD’s to carry on the tradition. She thought the world of him and his elaborate costumes ect. We also loved crooner music. Her and I loved Michael Buble but also Frank Sinatra and the rat pack. Whenever I hear “I did it my way” I think of my grandma…..because she did everything her way.

 

I could go on and on. She will forever be a part of my heart, My story, my life. Some bonds will never be broken. NO matter our distance.

I love you forever and always Grandma.

C

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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12 Comments

  1. Kathy R. February 10, 2021 at 6:54 am - Reply

    So sorry for your loss. Hugs.

  2. VANESSA Kay VANTREASE February 10, 2021 at 8:02 am - Reply

    Oh Charisma, I’m so sorry for your loss. Your elegant words have described a strong, caring person and it made me think that she will live on forever in your heart; you were fortunate to have such an independent, strong role model in your life.

  3. J Young February 10, 2021 at 8:13 am - Reply

    I lost my grandma too but only my physical grandma. My grandma lives forever in my heart. Now as a grandmother to 12 children I can only hope to be half the grandmother my grandma is, because everyday I strive to be not only like her but all my Lord has for me to do or be.
    I offer my prayers of comfort in this time of your loss and much laughter as you continue to carry her in your heart.
    Someday, Lord willing and the creek doesn’t rise you will also be an amazing “grandma.”
    Thanks for sharing, touched my heart.
    Gods Blessings

  4. Jane Y. February 10, 2021 at 10:30 am - Reply

    I feel the pain of your loss through the words you shared about your Grandma. It is all the wonderful memories you have that will help you get through this. And – you have God to lean on for your comfort and peace. My prayers and thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

  5. Joanne L Wilson February 10, 2021 at 10:42 am - Reply

    I am so sorry for your loss. Your Grandmother sounds like a wonderful person and one that I would have loved to have had as a friend. She is looking down on you now. Sending hugs.

  6. Dawn W. February 10, 2021 at 11:04 am - Reply

    I am so very sorry for your loss. It sounds like you had the most beautiful relationship. I hope the pain you feel now quickly moves to reflection on all the wonderful memories you had together.

  7. Jill Therriault February 10, 2021 at 11:16 am - Reply

    Charisma, What a beautiful tribute to what seems an outstanding woman. That is the grandma I strive to be. May God comfort you today as you bask in the sweet memories of the woman who comforted, loved and accepted you.

  8. Beate Ann Keith February 10, 2021 at 12:33 pm - Reply

    Sorry for your loss. Keeping you in prayer.

  9. Sue Fitzpatrick February 10, 2021 at 2:51 pm - Reply

    So sorry for your loss Charisma, you have written a beautiful remembrance of your dear grandmother who was very special to you. Blessings to you.

  10. Betty February 10, 2021 at 5:38 pm - Reply

    What a Blessing that you got to share time with her, in which, left you with some wonderful memories. May those memories be the Blessings that fill the void when you need it most.
    Hugs and Prayers…..Betty

  11. Nancy February 10, 2021 at 7:06 pm - Reply

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers! I hope you save the post you wrote as a tribute to your grandmother, and read it when you are down.She would want you remember her support, her joy and zest for living, the wisdom she shared, and how much she loved you!
    God bless and comfort you

  12. Karen February 11, 2021 at 5:54 pm - Reply

    Charisma, I am so sorry about your loss of your very special Grandma. She has left you with quite a legacy and some wonderful memories. Hugs.

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