18 Years Together

Categories: BlogBy Published On: December 31, 202032.6 min read715 words1 Comment

On Jan 1st, 18 years ago I married “The Rob”

We got married on a holiday so that he would remember. hehe. He isn’t good with dates. I am ok with that. It doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore. It did so many years ago because I wanted him to acknowledge those important dates. But our lives were much different back then. I don’t think we typically celebrate anything, anymore. We simply aren’t that way. I think life changes and quite frankly, we had 6 kids and we celebrated so much and did so much while they were all home that we are exhausted now. LOL!  Years seem shorter and it seems as soon as you put all of the decorations for one holiday it is just a few blinks and you are decorating again. So I have been simplifying and eliminating unnecessary extras. I try to focus on the more important things. We also appreciate the rest and down time a little more these days.

18 years ago we were typically in survival mode and pulled in all of these different directions. Trying to find our way and raise all of these kids with different needs and personalities. Those were difficult years but also the most rewarding.

This night 18 years ago we had 5 kids ( pregnant with Roo) and we all stayed the night at my grandma’s house in Spokane. That way we could go to the hitching post in North Idaho the next day and get married. We barely had enough money to do that. My grandma loved having all of us there. She made Rob endless mugs of hot buttered rum, the kids had a table full of treats and she was excited to be part of it. She told me that night that it seems busy and difficult now with all of this chaos but that someday, I would miss all of it. She was happy to have a little chaos that night because she missed it. She did admit that she was worn out and exhausted after we left. LOL! She was right. Part of me does miss all of the chaos. But I must laso admit when our family does get together I feel like a nap is needed after.

All of those worries about my marriage back then have dissipated. I was always worried that after the kids left home that Rob and I wouldn’t have anything in common. We wouldn’t have much to talk about and I wondered if we could withstand the test of time and life.

Good News.

We made it. LOL

We have plenty to talk about. We like being together. We hike, we walk the dogs, we talk politics ( we don’t always agree) and we are both so tired that we like being home. We love to eat and we are really good at daydreaming about our future. There has been a switch somewhere. We went from dreaming and working for our kids’ future to now figuring out our future and how we want to live.

We are in the stage of life where we are finishing the raising of our children, navigating the process of having adult children and their choices, dealing with ailing parents and accepting our own vulnerabilities and longevity.

2020 has brought a new perspective for all of us, hasn’t it? I have learned that Rob and I will get the job done. We work really hard. We can usually figure it out. I have learned that we also have a natural way about us that most of the time, we know how the other will react and who will take which responsibility and step in when needed. Rob still makes me laugh. I think, I appreciate that a little more. I think we have both realized that as long as we are together, that is all we need.  Simple.

I think I have spent my life complicating things. Not on purpose. But I overthink, analyze and worry. why? Simple things make me happy and I find blessings in the everyday things. I hope you have those as well.

So Happy Anniversary to my Love. I hope we have many more years together. I am blessed and I am glad that I get to do life with you.

Charisma

 

 

 

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One Comment

  1. Janina December 31, 2020 at 4:12 pm - Reply

    My husband and l are celebrating 50 this year! It seems I blink and the year has passed ! Congratulations to you and your husband. When we had been married 18 years I gave my husband a card that said “ here’s to 16 happy years!” He said Hey it’s been 18 … I said yes and 16 of them have been happy!! A day here, a day there they add up after awhile!

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