Grateful

This year has been a difficult year for me. I have been through a lot. I have learned several lessons. But something that I think is truly a lifeline is living in gratefulness.

Seriously.

I know people say this. I have said this. But I have had to FORCE myself some days to really find one thing in each moment, hour, day to be thankful for something that is immediately affecting me.  I am thankful for the ability to walk, pay my bills, eat food….any food that I want. Modern conveniences.

Seriously..all of these things we take for granted….I have made myself aware of those things more than ever. Just because I am feeling insecure in myself. Feeling like my foundation has crumbled a bit because my adult children haven’t turned out like I expected. That turned my world upside down. I think it doesn’t help that I have all of these kids one year apart…so I just have one right after another leave the nest and cause this snowball effect.

But I think I am getting over this hump. Prayers, Finding the blessings in everyday and building new traditions. We have to revise every holiday…Every function ect. Just because we aren’t all living in the same places. One of my children got married ( it’s not a good thing. I was crushed) so now there are spouses and  girlfriends, fiances ect. So we have to find a new groove. I new way of life and change is difficult for everyone. But I think for Rob and I …it’s worse. We have revolved our whole lives around our kids. So we don’t have friends that we hang out with…. or many activities that we engage in because the kids consumed us. So we have to find new things to do.

My survival tactic has honestly been praying and looking for all that I have rather than focusing on what I don’t have.

So we have never done anything big for Thanksgiving. It’s always been a sewing weekend for me. This time it isn’t. We decided to do something fun and BIG. to create a good memory….because we need it.  The three of us will have a great weekend and create a fun memory on Thanksgiving 2017! We need it.

Some things I am really thankful for on this day:

My husband. Seriously. I put him through a lot this year. He hasn’t handled everything like a pro…  he has had his bumps and scrapes. But he’s here and my protector. I admire that and it makes me love him more. He will do anything to protect me..even if it is from myself.

My children. They teach me every-single-day. I am having tough lessons and learning as I go.

My dogs. If not for my dogs I am certain I wouldn’t be as sane right now.

My friends. My friends have saved my life. I wouldn’t be who I am without them.

My 2 brothers. I am so thankful to have them in my life. They make me feel like I belong.

My body. I am struggling right now. I have actually gained 10 pounds. I know it’s bad eating habits that have creeped in along with a back issue. I can’t jog right now. So next week I am going to start getting back to swimming because I think it’s the only thing I can do currently.But I know that I am healthy and my body will rise up to the occasion. I am very thankful for that.

My home. As much as my house frustrates me because we have all of these unfinished projects….I am thankful for my home. We have decided 2018 will be the year that we finish all of our unfinished projects….because I am going to pull my hair out if we don’t.

Our New hot tub. My injured back adores this. But Honestly we come up with a time every night that we all get in ( sometimes Roo doesn’t join us) and we talk and relax and enjoy that time together. No phones…just talking and relaxing. although it is a bit creepy sometimes when Kali ( my little black lab) jumps up and tries to get in..LOL. She just pops up our of nowhere..and it’s funny. Those dogs make me laugh every day.

All of my modern conveniences. Last week it wasn’t lost on me that I had my dishwasher running, along with my washer and dryer, my Roomba was vacuuming and I had my computer quilter running..while I was also quilting. I also had a crockpot cooking my dinner. How amazing is it to live in 2017? Truly astounding!!

my suburban. I drive an old suburban. My husband has asked me to get a new car time and time again. But honestly…I won’t ever have a car pmt again. My car is paid for and I used to need that big car. I know I could get better gas mileage. But it has never had an issue and I have a history with it. I don’t actually drive many places and it’s comfortable. So I will keep it until it dies. we are bonded.

my business. I am thankful that I get to work from home using my talents and drive. I work in the best community on the planet and I couldn’t ask for anything more. On this note I am also thankful for fabric….it’s y kryptonite.

Tv. iphones,netflix….ect. Seriously. It’s my link to the world.

sewing – sewing is one of my therapies. I am not sure how I would function without being able to sew.

Most of all I am thankful for God. he is always listening to me….reliving me of my pain and helping to give me peace. I keep having to go to him to get those things….but he is patient….:)

On my bad days….I will look for the smallest thing to be thankful for so that can be my focus. it is much better to live in that space rather than not….so I highly recommend that coping mechanism..it has saved me this year!

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you!

I hope you all focus on the blessings of your everyday..it’s so worth it!

charisma