Since I posted a “Charisma” Post. You know the ones..where I talk about my thoughts ..what I am going through and my thought processes…daily ramblings.
I have been going through alot actually. My Dear friend Cindi is having her surgery today. She has breast cancer. This is not her first time with cancer ( it’s her fourth). She handles it all so well….at least on the outside. When something like that occurs it gets you thinking. One of my childhood friends died from breast cancer a few years back. She was having hip problems…went to the Dr. she was already at stage 4. It has spread to her hip. She was in her very early 30’s like 31. I have been to many breast cancer fundraisers..and heard many messages from survivors…and the ones that survive say it wasn’t the most diffcult battle in their life..I even heard from one woman who was in her last stage of life..having to leave her 2 children and husband and she was looking forward to going. She had clearly already delt with the pain of accepting her fate. As a Christian we know we have a better place to be …with Jesus. None the less thinking about leaving our family is difficult. Why? Well I was thinking about this. For my own family..it’s not that I don’t trust God to take care of them. I don’t know if I have faith in my family to trust Him with all they have. I am not saying they have not been taught. I am not saying they don’t know who He is…I am just not sure they have completely fallen in Love with Jesus. Freewill. Freewill. Freewill. It’s not that I can make them ..and God doesn’t make us love him..it’s freewill. With my teenagers..I am not sure they love me some days..LOL.
I am sure I have laid down a foundation. My family is no different than many other families on the planet. But I do feel a sense of responsibility to continue leading them. I know it won’t stop when they leave home. Their experiences need to lead them to Jesus. I can’t do it for them. But in the end…God knows them far better than I do..and if it is a hard rocky bottom that they need to have their “Come to Jesus” Moment …God already knows that. He will grab them as he knows best…at just the right time. My biggest prayer and most heart felt is that we all go be with Jesus.
So that is one heart felt thing I have been going through.
Superficial things..I went to Zumba last night. Then our tax appt. UGH! I was so good on my cals yesterday until after tax appt. I skipped dinner cause I didn’t have time..then worked out. Hungry. Then dealing with stressful things like finances. You know what I did next? Fast Food! Evil fast food. Not even Subway. Yep! I felt so horrible after wards and I couldn’t even stay awake my stomach hurt so bad. I fell asleep reading my book. Rob was in 7th heaven I might add. UGH to him! So today I am going to be better. I have grilled chicken and salad on the menu tonight.
Another thing that I feel I need to talk about is friends. I am abundantly blessed with friends. I don’t know how I would make it through life in general without my friends. I am the person who loves whole heartedly..I think most of you know that. So even if I haven’t spent physical time with my friends ( you know? internet friends) you all still weigh heavily on my heart. It doesn’t take much for me to fall in love with someone. I feel so easily, just about everything…It’s a good and bad thing.
I have had to cut of some relationships and that is never easy. But most of the time that is just self preservation..and you can’t be around people who suck life out of you…right? I can’t shine if I am drained of light. Many things can drain your energy. I can drain my own energy. Choices I make everyday can do that…when we make healthy choices for ourselves…in one area of our life it seeps into other areas of our life..right? So if I make better choices choosing people who will help life/lift me up…I will probably make better choices with taking care of myself. If I make better choices with eating and exercising …then I tend to want to take an extra minute to take care of my skin…and put on the smelly lotion I like so much..right? It all trickles into other things. Then as a whole you are put together to be better.
Yesterday Virgina sent this quote to me and I just LOVE it….She doesn’t know the author.
“Oh, the comfort – the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person – having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away”
This is the type of friend I stive to be…
I am certain that my life would have taken a completely different turn if I didn’t pay attention to the friends God put in my path. They have taught me a better way to live, breathe and LOVE. I am a better parent, wife and person because of my friends. So a big HUG &KISS to all of you who have enriched my life!
This quote needs to be on my resolutions quilt…I picture it with a picture of a dandilion that has gone to seed …the seeds blowing away and a few left in the hand.
So besides God& your family …what is your greatest accomplishment? Or passion? I would have to say friends. I try invest in my relationships everyday…in some way or another.
Have a blessed day!